Thursday 2 July 2009

Hobby?

Anna's after-school activities have wound down for the summer and we are talking about what she might like to do next year. She has been doing swimming and recorder lessons. She would like to do gymnastics and piano lessons. I think it is always a tricky balance between her doing too much (and me having to taxi her to and from these things) and yet letting her pursue some different interests and also be in a group outside of her school friends.
Also, if she is the next Olympic champion in archery, how will we know unless she has tried it?

A few years ago, Aksel decided he needed a hobby. Something other than work and family. So he took up macro photography, bought himself a fancy camera and has really enjoyed running out early in the morning to catch the light and the bugs and I have got used to him disappearing in a ditch while we are on a walk. As he got more into it, he ordered himself a new lens and more fancy equipment. You can see his great pictures on flickr.com/photos/mistermacro/.
Apparently, having a hobby is important in terms of your identity - it is important to define yourself other than just in terms of your job or your family. Perhaps especially in these times when more people are losing their jobs.

When Sam was about 3 months old, we visited Aksel's cousin, a busy doctor with two children of her own. And after hearing about Aksel's photography, she asked me what I did in my free time. Oh, how we laughed.

Free time? A hobby? Time to myself? Ha ha ha.

Seems like women with small children don't have any free time and certainly can't be pursuing a proper hobby. I know this is not exactly true for some super women - but it seems to be true for me in any case. Especially at that stage of baby-hood, when it is all about breastfeeding and not sleeping.

And I am not feeling resentful about this. I enjoy that Aksel has a hobby. And I'm glad he enjoys it. And now Samuel is getting a little older, I can see that I might have a little more available time, at some point. It's just that, if I get a spare moment, I am more likely to use it to lie on the sofa and eat chocolate.

Anyhow, is writing a blog classified as a hobby?

2 comments:

  1. Oh I totally identify with this, although I didn't allow MrSpud to have hobbies and still don't beyond working and looking after me ;-)

    I had my children in very quick succession. My first was 8 months old when I got pregnant again, so that last few years have been a blur of pregnancy, babyhood, not sleeping, breastfeeding, pregnancy AND breastfeeding, babyhood, breastfeeding, not sleeping etc. And those years were just about survival and nothing else.

    My eldest is 3 and youngest is 2. But for the last year, a little less maybe, it's been so 'doable'. And finally I do yoga/pilates twice a week, and I took up photography and now I blog. But until very recently even one of thse would have been just a dream.

    These precious early months and years are so, so hard. But they are so important for our children. So we, as mothers, give up ourselves to them so that they flourish as they grow. And then we get to reclaim ourselves again.

    Your time will come. In the meantime, eat chocolate and read magazines! You deserve it xx

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  2. oh, that's so funny that MrSpud is not allowed hobbies :) Thanks for your comments and for sharing. I started writing more in reply to this one but its turning into a post of its own, so I think I'll leave it at that for now.

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